austin_dern (austin_dern) wrote,
austin_dern
austin_dern

The action never stops

The water park, being indoors, and built onto a hotel which had already existed --- for some reason Sandusky went through an indoor waterpark boom over the past decade --- is not the biggest one in the area, but that was all right, since bunny_hugger and I are the sorts of people who can find a whole day's fascination in a tiny strip mall convenience store. What it offered, besides a pleasant dose warmth and mugginess, were high ceilings, that curious far-distant echoing of a none-too-big squealing crowd, and enough rides that we didn't actually get on all the adult-sized ones until our second day (our third, if you count the hot tub).

Our first big exercise was in the wave pool, my first experience with one outside Roller Coaster Tycoon 3, so now I know what I'm placing for my Peeps as a ride. That gave us various cycles of both being pushed around by the waves --- given the chance they'll shove me all the way to 'shore' --- and calm stretches when I could do my extremely low-impact version of the breast stroke, in which neither hands nor feet penetrate the water line and I just sort of shuffle along, turtle-like, and thinking of that Robert Benchley essay on new swimming strokes.

We also got to thinking about Action Park, the infamous New Jersey water park that I'm really sure I never got to in its body-busting prime no matter what my father said. We'd had the thought that a ``water carousel'' sounded like a great idea for a ride, and whatever it might be, it still is. Just, what the ride would be is a bit vague --- a carousel that goes through water curtains? Maybe one that submerges partway into a pool? And now let me recover this paragraph from its disjoint nature by saying what we thought to do with the water carousel idea: how could we make a ``water carousel'' which would have that little touch of obviously dangerous madness that would fit into Action Park? Remember, Action Park is the place that had a for real not Photoshopped looping water slide, and did a ``bumper boat'' ride with the electric grid underneath the water so if you fell out of your boat, ah, don't fall out of your boat.

Our conclusion: it'd have the mounts --- fiberglass and smooth, so when damp they'd have no friction --- going up and down through the water, of course, but also held to the base by broad U-type hooks just high enough that a careless foot could slip underneath, and drag the hapless rider who slipped under the water surface again and again until the inattentive ride operator noticed and shut things down. That's producing an Action Park Mad ride.

As best I can tell, our discussions about how to make a water park ride so obviously dangerous people would think we were making it up did not annoy the actual lifeguard/operators overseeing the wave pool.

Trivia: By 1852 Austria had 1,053 miles of telegraphic wire; Canada, 983. Source: The Victorian Internet, Tom Standage.

Currently Reading: A History Of Venice, John Julius Norwich.

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